“United States: You have two cows. The government pays you subsidies not to milk your cows. Imports of dairy products from South America increase.
China: You have two cows. The government takes both cows and shoots you.
Iraq: You have two cows. They end up in Guantanamo Bay, but receive excellent medical care.
India: You have two cows. You worship them.
Poland: You have two bulls. You get killed trying to milk them.
Russia: You have two cows. You drink vodka and see four cows.
Argentina: You have two cows. Néstor and Cristina Kirchner take the milk and export it. They tax you 44%, leaving you without enough money to cover production costs. Too bad! On the plus side Cristina is able to pay for Botox injections and pays off some political cronies.”